Come on now, girlfriend!

When will we, as women, learn to love ourselves and give up the idea of perfection?

I am all for self-improvement.  I am a mental health therapist for God sake!  To those of us who want to get in better shape and fit in to last year's dress- more power to us all!  But, for those of us that want to be skeletal and unhealthy- Come on now girlfriend!

It's no secret I love fitness.  I drink my shakes, I work out, and I try not to eat the entire restaurant when I go out.  At the same time, I want to be healthy, happy, and minimize the amount of fat I am carrying around.  I think these are all realistic goals.  I don't have a problem with these goals. I do have a problem with goals that amount to unhealthy living, both physically and mentally.

I am of a certain age where it really does seem to get harder to stay within a healthy body mass index.  Whereas I could eat pretty unhealthy, work out, and still fit in my skinny jeans 10 years ago, I now have to make better food choices while working out in order to fit in to my skinny jeans.  And this is not really a bad thing because in the process I am making my insides healthier too.  Most of my friends are of a certain age as well, so this topic of body image tends to crop up frequently.  And I don't mind it when we can stay within the healthy, realistic realm.  But when conversation goes beyond this, I find myself getting angry.

I am not necessarily angry at the person I am talking to... I am angry that we as women still put most of our value in a number on a scale.  I am including myself in this, by the way, because I have my bad days too.  And on these bad days I can be one bad picture, one rude comment, or one accidental step on the scale away from hysteria.  AND WHY???

Because, you see, when one of my girlfriends or family members starts devaluing themselves, I am not far behind.  We women want to blame men and society and blah, blah, blah, when we are doing it to each other!  Last poll I checked, men like their women with curves.  Last advertisement I checked, Dove is leading the way in normalizing curvy women.  Now granted, we as a society have a ways to go but think about the last time you felt bad about your body and I bet it will be a conversation, comment, or look from another woman.  Come on now, girlfriend!  Love yourself first.  The rest will come.  Spend the energy you currently do on those last 10 pounds on loving yourself, living life, and giving back.  The rest will come.

What about the amazing, loving mother you are?  And the sexy wife your husband loves?  What about how you work your ass off to clean your house, cook a meal, or bring home the second income?  What do any of those things have to do with being a size 2?!

Health and happiness go hand in hand.  A healthy body can fall within or just outside of a healthy Body Mass Index range of numbers.

Come on girlfriend!  Together we can be happier women, I promise!